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Strange new Computer Viruses

The Al Gore Virus – 
Causes your computer to just keep counting and
re-counting.

The Clinton Virus – 
Gives you a 7 inch Hard Drive with NO memory.

The Bob Dole (aka Viagra) Virus – 
Makes a new hard drive out of an old floppy.

The Lewinsky Virus –
Sucks all the memory out of your computer, then
e-mails everyone
about what it did.

The Mike Tyson Virus – 
Quits after two bytes.

The Oprah Winfrey Virus – 
Your 300 Mb hard drive shrinks to 100 Mb, then
slowly expands to re-stabilize around 200 Mb.

The Jack Kevorkian Virus – 
Deletes all old files.

The Ellen Degeneres Virus – 
Disks can no longer be inserted.

The Prozac Virus – 
Totally screws up your RAM, but your processor
doesn’t care.

The Joey Buttafuoco Virus – 
Only attacks minor files.

The Arnold Schwarzenegger Virus – 
Terminates some files, leaves, but will be back.

AND HERE COMES MY FAVOURITE …..
The Bush Virus – Once infected will attack and delete all nearby hardrives on a system for 4 years and then try to do it all over again for another 4 years.

AND THIS ONE FOR GOOD MEASURE:
The Lorena Bobbitt Virus –
Reformats your hard drive into a 3.5 inch floppy . .
then discards it through Windows.

k0nsl

k0nsl

k0nsl is a programmer, server administrator, designer, moderator, spokesman and factotum of a wide-variety of web pages. You can reach k0nsl via e-mail — i.am@k0nsl.org.

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